Even a beautiful mirror can be deceiving. That is why people always check more than once before leaving the house, one last look to make sure the best is what we see, or at least the best were capable of… and even then we manage to find fault where maybe fault doesn’t even exist. We are the worst critics.
Trusting that imperfection is the first step, embracing the imperfections we all have is a great place to start.
I suppose this is one of those issues that begins at home as a small child. Telling your children how beautiful and smart they are always…
No one is perfect. Yet everyone is perfectly beautiful just the way they are.
We all have so many things about ourselves as we get older that we find repulsive and unattractive, wrinkles, smile lines, a little extra weight, put on from giving birth, beautiful babies. Depression, a lost one, a death, a divorce, being unhappy, so many reasons that people binge eat, or even go as far as starving their precious bodies.
As we age our bodies change, we are no longer the little children that can do back flips at a moments notice and land on their feet and do it over and over.. we are older and our bodies can no longer hold up to the same standards.
Many moons ago when I met my husband I was still proud of being able to Double Dutch with the young ones. I was a champ. My husband smiled and was pleasantly surprised.
That was a long time ago. Those days have come and gone and only the memory lingers inside my brain.
I loved it. I jumped till I could no longer catch my breath and even the inhaler didn’t do it’s job. …and then I jumped some more with all the children in the park strangers alike. What a memory.
I taught all my kids, they too can fancy jump!
We spent hours and hours jump roping out of breath and weary legs carried us back inside our home to get cleaned up and make diner … tomorrow being a new day to try again. Or find new adventure , something new to attempt! I believe we did give it a whirl with stilts… that did not end as well!
but we tried.
There are so many things about ourselves we are so critical our body size, face, hair, too curly, too thick, to thin, to short, its perfect, and then our hair turns gray, or worse falls out and men start going bald, they too are not happy with this fact, it is a sign we have aged.
Life.. getting older hopefully wiser, but we can not turn the clocks back.
Plastic surgery doesn’t turn the time backwards.
It only masks the outside visual.
We must learn to embrace the changes and make the best with what we have to work with. For me, looking at the others who have gone before me and have shown their aging signs first, I see beauty, I see a lifetime of memories, not all happy ones, but a life that has been lived.
The body shows the life you’ve been busy living. Healed broken bones, sore back, strained muscles, getting old has a price and usually it is the body that pays. These days we say make sure to take better care of your body, I try for the most part, though energy is not what it used to be by no means.
(This is one of very few women I have actually read everything she ever wrote or was written about her. We could all take notice and actually listen to her words. She was a tremendously smart woman)
I find that I spend a good deal of time thinking about people with artificial limbs, or no limbs.. Are they perfect? It surely is not how they were meant to be . Yet, many ( not all) but many find their inner strength and end up running marathons with an artificial limb! I am always amazed at their determination. That to me is the greatest of will power, mind over matter… an amazing inner strength to overcome any amount of pain. Just because they have run it does not mean they are pain-free, they just bite the bullet and go for it!
I admire that most of all!
I have an artificial limb, actually I have two you just cannot see them for they are implanted inside my body. I have two artificial hips one has screws so it stops coming loose. I look fairly normal on the outside so most do not see my issues other than they can tell I limp. I don’t go around pointing out hey look my legs are fake, I do my best not to draw any attention to myself. Some days I push to hard. I pay badly for days afterwards but I want to live and enjoy my life so I can’t sit around like a couch potato I have things I want to do. So each day I give it all I have and some days that is too much because I am not smart enough to know when to stop! I’m on a roll look out get out of my way I am on a mission. I’ll pay later that is just the way it is!
Resting a weary body is the only way to allow the body to catch up and heal. I have to remind myself of this and try not to feel guilty about it. Words so easily spoken , not always easy to put into play. I assure you.
This is what I have inside both my legs.
On the outside I wear two long scars down each side of what used to be a rounded , heart-shaped ass, now these days I wear dents where my round parts used to be.
Deal with it!
( I am trying)
Again we are our own worst critics!
This is a great photo to give someone who has no idea what exactly it looks like on the inside. It is an artificial hip, ball and socket. It takes a different kind of beating then the bones we are born with. I walk with a cane outside my home and I am amazed at how rude people can be. I have an handicapped sticker and I am stunned at the lack of sensitivity that healthy people will have. They are upset and angry because they cannot park in these closer spots. Lazy! I just park in these few spots when I cannot make the long walk across the parking lots. Half the time I cannot park in them because they are either taken up by someone else who is handicapped or some idiot who thinks they can do whatever they want and it’s not hurting anyone anyways… how wrong they are! They do not seem to consider the long walk it is for the person with no leg or a bum leg or worse. They are self-absorbed. It makes me so frustrated. I see it every day.
I had a man yell at me because he assumed I was NOT handicapped.( I did not have my cane out of the car yet, and I do not always use it.)
This is my lifeline when I am alone walking outdoors.
It was all I could do not to really cause a scene. I was calm and I spoke, I said, (to this obviously unhappy man who had nothing better to do then judge someone he did not know.) I began slowly, Sir, I spoke, I have had 4 hip replacements, two realigned legs, 14 knee surgeries and waiting on artificial new knees, I have reconstructed hands both of them .. I was nowhere near done but at this point the man had his mouth gaping open. I skipped over the rest and simply said to him, ” listen I don’t know you, but to judge someone based on the way they may seem is the same thing as basing a person on the color of their skin or gender. You don’t know me or the struggle I had getting into this car or out of bed this morning or picking up my cup of coffee ! I see you have bags of groceries in your hands instead of being angry at where I am parking, do you need a hand? I can help you put your groceries in your car… he just looked at me speechless. I smiled at him and said just because I am handicapped in my limbs doesn’t mean I am handicapped in my heart or my personality!
It is not hard to be kind it takes less energy to be kind then to get all riled up and angry it ruined your day not mine.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder they have said for centuries. One may have wrinkles on the outside but when you love someone what you see is this… not all the wrinkles and imperfections. My husband tells me this almost every time he sees me.
I suppose I am just a woman in progress, aren’t we all? We each have our challenges and just because I wear mine on the inside and not everyone can actually see them doesn’t make them any more real or less than the one who wears them on the outside for anyone to see . Judging is a horrible thing. I suggest you don’t do it.
Every day we each stand in front of a mirror and see how we look if our hair is done right, do the clothes fit properly, do I look too fat too thin too old?
We all ask the same questions.
I have told my children and friends alike for more years than I care to count, you best love what you see in the mirror you’re the one who has to live with that person sleep with that person and will get up tomorrow with that person. So make damn sure it is a person you love.
For me the images of what I see are not always the images that I say, I am older, I am grayer, I am made mostly of artificial parts, I do not wear my clothes the same way, nor my hair. I am learning to re love the images I see when I look in my mirror instead of covering the mirrors up or just not looking in them at all.
Inside this old woman broken and battered I am the same gal with a big heart who cares more for others than herself. That is the image I see not the broken down woman my BODY has become. I simply have to change my perception of the images.
That is how I choose to describe myself these days. It is an interesting read.
A little tattered, not in perfect condition but still chic and sometimes a little worn and not always matching. But it has a purpose, and it has a story, and it is comfortable and always inviting. Now how ugly can that be?
It is a Japanese way of decorating actually but I have chosen it to describe me.
“Beautiful young people are an accident, but beautiful old people are honest works of art.” E.R.
Cherish and embrace the unique qualities we each old, it is what makes each of us special and different. Bring yourself to the table, you have so much to offer, don’t be anyone but you. You are pretty awesome just the way you are!
Our Wabi Sabi beings are incredible, so share t with the world and love it!
Imagine how much richer our lives will be when we embrace this!
Thanks again for coming along with me for another day …
Have a great weekend, stay warm and be happy .
Robin~ a simple bird.